Rating(s) of the fic you want: E (Everyone),
Which brother do you want your story to be about?: Taylor
Genre you want your story to be: Drama
Three specific things you want your fic to include:
- A kiss
- “I never had this planned”
- A very sad song
Three things you do not want your fic to include:
The wind was blowing steadily across the meadow of flowers, sending them to move just enough to see a wave. Taylor stood at his window, staring out at what he could never touch, his eyes were bloodshot with dark circles around them from lack of sleep. His fingers grazed the window pane, trickling the tips at the same rate the flowers moved. From his lips, he whispered the lyrics to the song he wrote for her when she was still alive.
” … Another day is more then I can take … I just want to be by your side … I don’t want to be just drifting through the sea of life …”
He’d missed a lot of the lyrics due to his poor memory, but those verses stuck out the most because they were her favorite. He lifted his hand that was at his side and pressed it over his heart, feeling his heart beat. Oh how he missed her dearly. He closed his eyes and a memory flashed before his eyes.
He was standing in the middle of the field. The very field where he took her. He wanted to show her how much he loved her. He wanted her to feel how much his heart felt for her. He just wanted to make her understand that he loved her and that she was the only woman he was every going to love.
Before him, stood the woman of his dreams, but she didn’t look the way he remembered. In his memory, she had flowing long blonde hair, and sparkling green eyes. Her skin was a smooth mocha color and her body was thin and frail. But the woman who stood before him now, was the one that haunted his every waking thought, the one that haunted his sleep, made him terrified of the dark, and sleep. Her hair was matted and grungy, her eyes were a fiery green with a hint of red. Her flesh was torn everywhere, gashes across her face and arms. She stood before him, a smirk upon her face.
“How could you?” She’d always ask, with that scratchy voice that always made him shiver. “How could you do that, Taylor?”
“I never had this planned.” He’d reply. It was the same reply he would always give. It was the same thing he said over and over for a week straight, the week they had him in observation. He’d sit on his bed and hold himself, rock his body back and forth, repeating the words over and over until they’d slur over his tongue.
Taylor opened his eyes and allowed the tears to flow down his red cheeks, dripping when they got to the end of his chin. At first, he would wipe them away before they had a chance to spill over his lids, but now he just let them roll down. He didn’t care anymore who saw him breakdown.
The sweet voice he knew as his mother filled the room and he smiled weakly as he turned around. She was the only one that knew how much love he held for her. She was the only one who knew just how over powering love could be. She was the only one who understood him without any words.
“Mama.” Taylor replied, as she rushed over to him with a look of concern washing on her face.
“Honey, don’t cry.” She said, knowing very well it’d only make him cry more. She embraced him and placed on hand on his head as he laid it on her shoulder. She gently ran her fingers through the matted locks of blonde hair. He hadn’t brushed it in God knows when. Ushering her son to his bed, she sat him down and cupped his face in her hands.
“When can I go home, mama?” Taylor asked, tears spilling over his lids uncontrollably. It felt like they’d never stop. They hadn’t stopped in over a month.
Taylor’s mother shook her head, trying to will her own tears away so her son couldn’t see, but he always did. She knew that he always knew when she was trying to hide her tears. “I don’t know, baby.” She replied. It was also the same answer she always gave him when she saw him. The doctors weren’t sure whether or not Taylor was safe back in the community. “Hopefully soon. You just have to wait it out, okay?” She asked, looking into his crying pools of blue.
“Mama, I hate it here. I don’t want to be here. I want to go home.” The words were sliding off his tongue the faster he spoke. Every time he saw his mother, he always feel the need to just, apply pressure to her. To try to make her talk to the doctors. He never meant to hurt her and he wouldn’t hurt anyone else. Why couldn’t he just go home? All he wanted was to go home.
“I know baby,” Taylor’s mother spoke softly, running her hand along his cheek and wiping away the tears. “I know you do, but they are not sure you’re mentally fit to come home.”
“I’m not crazy!” Taylor protested, stomping his foot against the cold linoleum floor. “I’ll do anything they want me to, I promise. Mama, you know I always keep my promises.” He added, a new trail of tears rolling down his face.
Taylor’s mother nodded and pulled her son into a tight hug. As much as he wanted to come home, she wanted it too. She missed her son so dearly. “Taylor, you need to tell the doctors what happened.” She said, pulling away gently. “They want to know and I think that’s why they are keeping her here.”
Taylor glanced towards the window and shrugged, “I told them already.”
“You did?” His mother asked, surprised. “What did you tell them?”
Taylor looked back at his mother, his face completely hallow, his eyes empty. “I told them I loved her too much. That’s what happened, I loved her too much and it was too overbearing for her, I guess.”
Taylor’s mother sighed and gave her son a kiss on his forehead. “I love you sweetie.” She smiled weakly at him. “I’ll come tomorrow, okay?”
“Could you bring someone along too?” His voice was so hopeful even though he knew what she would say the next day when she’d come alone. No one else wanted to see him. They all believed the way everyone else believed. They believed he hurt her, they believed he meant to hurt her.
“I’ll see, okay?” Her voice was cracking and she leaned down to give him another kiss on his head before rushing out of the room.
“All I did was love her.” He whispered after his mother. “That’s all.”
That night, Taylor laid on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. The flickering lights from the hall always made him feel a little safe. He missed the confines of his room. He was such a private person, and loved to spend hours beyond hours in his room, doodling with different things. There were so many different things he could do in his room, or just at home. He wanted to go home so badly.
Reaching underneath his pillow, he pulled out the handful of sleeping pills that he’d accumulated over the month he was there and held them in his hand. The first night there, the nurse gave him one pill and told him that it was supposed to knock him out for eight to twelve hours. Moving the pills around in his hand, he decided that that night, he was going to go home.
Surely they would have to take his body home.